Still waiting for answers.
Monday18May2009
School was sorta fucked up today xD Like why the hell do i even
attend school today? No papers come back -.-
Even if they do, they would suck. Big time.
Seriously, now school in my eyes is like a piece of shit. I have nothing to do there, and beside things are'nt going well D:
Okay, going on with the day already. Um, lessons were as usual.
All we did was going through out corrections and for social studies.. Mrs Quek took over clas as relief :D Miss her sooooo much :3
After school, slacked in canteen till 3.15 then headed to band :D
stupid darling shad pranked everyone with her fake LG mobile model.
She ar.. practically made everybody priceless face
flush down into the toilet bowl xD Typical shad :D
Oh yeah, we threw her phone into basketball hoops.
Like using her her fake phone as her basketball can?
In the end by the sectionals of band the phone was destroyed and
she continued to dismentle the cruddy phone xD
Yeap, for today's band prac.. we played ABBA ON BROADWAY all the way..
Was pretty boring today. Really it is ._.
But thank gof seak jing yi is there to make me laugh whenever :D
Haha he's so cuteee :X For a brother as in.
Yeah, but sad he may be tranferred to bass clarinet D:
I mean if he does who gonna crap with me whenever.
I mean Charmaine just got tranferred to 1st too.
Well, i just hope things will go on well after the holidays :D
So yeah, after band went home. Reached home at 7.
It's been a month now, i'm still waiting for some answers.
To my dearest Yao Xing;
Yes my dear, i'm not good with words in the face.
But what i wanted to say cheng already did.
I know, yes you feel like ending your life.
I've said it and not the first time. You are never alone.
You just gotta stand up an believe in yourself.
I know sometimes cheng and i have been neglecting you.
But you should know right down in your kuku kind heart that we still care for you :)
Like cheng said, i know you won't want to listen to us/ anyone. It's definately you.
You will always say the same thing like " I don't want to care anymore"
" I want to give up" " I can't take it anymore".
Where did my brave and dare daring yao xing ying go?
She use to be a strong independent and cute, The thang i love.
You used to be stronger than me and you always tell me to stand strong. Then why can'st you just say that more to yourself and love yourself more?
Sometimes you just gotta think ahead and to see if things are worth it or not.
Sometimes you also gotta see the brighter side of life.
If your life is so bad that you wanna end it?.
Then ask yourself why are you in this world in the first place?
Because your parents wanted you, and if you want to end your life What difference would it make if they lose a child? or not having one in the first place.
Like i said this afternoon, ending your life does not have any advantage AT ALL.
Look, since there are so many problems.
Your loved ones will then also have another problem which is you?
Already so many problems and you want to add on with such a heavy blow?
Not worth it right? I mean why not instead, live your life.
And just support your loved ones if they are in need.
They would know, at least you care for them and you love them.
Suicide is just running away from your problems and
adding more difficulties to the ones close to you.
There is no way that you can make things better with suicidal. Really.
Be more positive and things will get better, eventaully.
I mean what if you're not here?
What will happen to cheng and me? Your family? Lucas? God? Your friends?
Never think its the end of your life becasue there are too many problems.
Maybe somethings you just have to let go and move on.
And some, you just have to give in but if you think it's really that important.
Fight for your rights, by all means. Listen and think through to what cheng and i said for once
We don't want you to be hurt ]: it's really heartbreaking.
I know there are many setbacks but dont always think you're alone. Infact you are'nt, you have many more friends than me. You are more social.
Not like me, an anti-social ._. I don't want you to act happy but be really happy.
It really does suck living like a counterfeit.
|
